Parliamentary Maneuver Of The Week

Dr. Marvin Monroe with his psychiatric patient, Bart Simpson

Dr. Marvin Monroe:  You LIKE attention, don’t you Li Ao?

Legislator Li:  Do I EVER!  Ha-haaa!

Dr. Monroe:  Well, we ALL do.  The PROBLEM is, you don’t care whether you get GOOD attention, for say, proposing beneficial new laws in the Taiwanese legislature…or BAD attention, for say, opening a can of tear gas inside a crowded committee room while warding off fellow politicians with an electric stun baton.

Legislator Lee Ao spraying can of tear gas in Taiwanese legislature

(Image of Independent Lawmaker (and Taipei mayoral candidate) Li Ao from Wednesday’s Taipei Times.  Yes, that’s a V for Vendetta-style Guy Fawkes mask affixed to the front of his gas mask.)


CAVEAT:  Currently, the public only has Mr. Li’s word to go on that his gas bomb actually contained what he said it contained.  There’s some corroboration in the fact that some committee members left the room coughing and tearing up, but it’s somewhat odd that there are no reports of any vomiting.


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KMT Gripes About America

You’d think the KMT would be happy.  Earlier this year, their chairman was welcomed with open arms in D.C., while their chief rival was generously offered the opportunity to rub shoulders with American movers and shakers.

In Alaska.

A few years prior to that, something similar happened.  The KMT was bitterly opposed to President Chen’s plan for a national referendum, and the Bush administration came out against it.  Chen was forced to alter the referendum’s wording, while the KMT gloated at this public loss of face.

But that was then.  Recently they’ve been asking, "What have you done for me, lately?"

Could the chief [U.S.] representative in Taiwan be named a persona non grata by lawmakers who were mostly U.S.-trained and known for their pro-U.S. stance?

Last Wednesday, the day after the famous National Day "disgrace", some two dozen "pan-blue" (KMT plus PFP) lawmakers actually talked about it.

Foreigners educated in America don’t necessarily become pro-American, but let’s let that slide.  The disgrace in sneer quotes the China Post refers to is when the KMT and its allies disrupted Taiwan’s National Day ceremonies by interrupting the president’s speech and engaging in fist fights with the president’s party.

If that happened on July 4th in America, would it be a disgrace?  Or merely a "disgrace"?

What irritated the KMT was what the representative said afterwards.  When asked to comment by the local media, Stephen Young said, "They should watch their manners…Go ask James Soong – why?"

(James Soong, chairman of the pro-communist People First Party, heckled the President’s speech and disrupted an official procession by marching with them while shouting anti-Chen slogans.)

Stephen Young’s candor on this matter wasn’t the only thing that upset the KMT.  In addition, they strongly disapprove of his efforts to lobby them into buying the weapons package President Bush approved back in 2001.  The weapons package that the KMT has blocked 58 times over the last two years.*

I imagine Mr. Young has been candid with them about THAT issue, as well.  Candid enough to tell them that their obstructionist record is starting to make America question their commitment to their own nation’s  security.

The China Post reveals the real reason for the KMT’s obstinacy:

There [was] "[a] sea change in KMT/PFP thinking" after historic visits to Beijing by KMT chairman Lien Chan and PFP chairman James Soong in 2005.  The blue camp’s support for a security relationship with [America]…seems in doubt now.

Perhaps it would be a good thing if the KMT did expel Mr. Young.  It might serve as a powerful wake-up call to Washington that the KMT is truly America’s ally no longer.


* The China Post dishonestly tries to divert some of the blame for the delay onto President Chen, claiming that he didn’t offer the weapons package to the legislature for two years because of its cost.

The reality is that it took 18 months after Bush’s offer for the package to be approved and given a price tag by the American military bureaucracy.  It was utterly impossible for Chen to offer the package to the legislature during that time.


UPDATE:  Another bone in the KMT’s craw:

The blue camp has been angry with the U.S. for breaking a promise of not recognizing President Chen’s 2004 re-election before a recount.

Who made this promise?  The President?  The V.P.?  Some low-level flunky in the State Department?  How could such a promise be issued at all, when it was unclear at the time that there would even BE a recount?

I have no recollection of this promise being mentioned in any of the local media, and I followed the coverage here pretty closely.  What I DO remember is the China Post calling on America not to congratulate Chen until after a recount, but that’s quite different from the promise having actually been made.  Perhaps the Post confuses its desires with reality:

If wishes were horses,
Beggars would ride;
If wishes were fishes,
We’d all have some fried.

The China Post then concludes with a complaint somewhat lacking in specificity:

Taiwan’s mentor-and-protector is also criticized for failing to stop the Chen administration from degenerating in all aspects, turning Taiwan into a big mess.

Yep, this whole "self-determination" thing really isn’t working out.  Could you Yanks do us a favor and dispatch the Delta Force next time madman Chen renames an airport or something?

Thanks a bunch.

UPDATE (Oct 22/06):  James Soong’s still pouting:

…Soong said he had turned down a request from American Institute in Taiwan [AIT] officials for a meeting with him next week.

"There is no need [for the AIT officials] to see me. Right now I am not the PFP’s representative," Soong said, without elaborating on why AIT officials wished to see him.

Yes, yes, I know, Soong’s running as an independent for mayor of Taipei.  But the CHAIRMAN of the PFP pretends that he doesn’t REPRESENT the PFP?

Riiight.

He explains his refusal this way:

"It’s not the right time to review the arms bill when millions of people are staging a sit-in [against the president]. Furthermore, AIT officials talked nonsense on Double Ten day," Soong said.

Soong’s not so shy about talking a little nonsense of his own.  I was at the Taipei Train Station on Friday.  Those "millions of people"?  They’re down to a few hundred, at most.

Direct Democracy

Yesterday’s editorial from the Taiwan News had a couple of lines I thought were very well-put:

Washington’s anxiety about cross-strait tension comes largely from the perception that Beijing will make a "dangerous, objectionable, and foolish response" to Taiwan’s continued affirmation of its sovereignty and independence.

Since the Beijing regime is even less predictable than democratic Taiwan it has been easier for Washington to attempt to constrain Taipei first or even treat the Taiwan leader as a "trouble-maker" than to address the structural problems [ie: CHINA] that cause these tensions.

There was another line that got me to thinking, though:

…the DPP administration [is making] efforts to deepen Taiwan’s democracy and enhance the effectiveness of democratic governance through constitutional reforms and the introduction of methods of direct democracy, which are common features of democratic societies around the world.  [Emphasis added]

I wonder if recent events surrounding Shih Ming-teh’s redshirts haven’t made DPP politicians a bit more wary of direct democracy.  I certainly wouldn’t blame them if they were.

KMT Winded From Recall Effort

Back in June, the KMT was champing at the bit to call non-confidence votes aimed at bringing down cabinet after cabinet.  I said this at the time:

Maybe [the KMT] can get away with toppling one cabinet, maybe even two.  But voters aren’t stupid, and the KMT can’t keep doing that with impunity for the next two years.

As it turns out, even THAT appraisal of the KMT’s public approval was optimistic.  Not even ONE cabinet has been toppled, and already voter disenchantment has already set in.  The KMT can read its internal polling, and is calling it quits…for now:

KMT spokesman Huang Yu-cheng added that following tumults brought by anti-corruption activities aimed at ousting the scandal-ridden President Chen Shui-bian and the vote on a motion to recall Chen in the Legislature, people need a breather.

…[the] KMT will let people rest and build up their strength for a while, Huang said.

Ignoring the loaded language, it’s instructive to remember that something similar happened back in June.  The KMT failed in getting the president recalled; their chairman lost public approval, and the KMT backed off.  Now, they’ve declared another moratorium, since their chairman’s dropping in the polls in the wake of the redshirts’ disruption of Taiwan’s National Day.

Count on history repeating itself.  They’ll be back.

The Three Stooges Celebrate Double Ten Day

Hey Moe, it’s Taiwan’s boitday!  We forgot to get ’em somethin’.  Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk.

I’ll give YOU somethin’, you knucklehead…

(Finger in eye)

The Three Stooges. Larry and Moe hold Curly's head.

(Photo from University of Kansas-Lawrence.)

Quit clownin’ around, Einsteen, and tell the nice people about the boitday.

Why, sointenee!

The Taiwan News informs us of some of the goings-on:

Apparently aggravated by the seating arrangement, Kuomintang [KMT] Legislator Lee Ching-hua stood up during President Chen Shui-bian’s address and repeatedly shouted slogans, demanding that Chen step down.

Provoked by Lee’s efforts to embarrass the president, Democratic Progressive Party [DPP] Legislator Lin Kuo-ching took a swing at Lee and a brief scuffle erupted…

Watched some of the Taiwanese TV coverage yesterday, and saw a few men in suits trying to avoid police by ducking in and out of an official parade.  Since I don’t understand Mandarin, I had no idea until the next day about what happened:

…a group of [pro-Communist] People First Party lawmakers, led by [PFP Chairman James] Soong, disrupted the honor guard procession in front of the Presidential Office, marching along with the guards, shouting anti-Chen slogans and holding anti-Chen banners.

The incident turned into a cat-and-mouse game when the security guards were forced to chase Soong and his followers…who weaved in and out [of] procession and completely ignored the security guards’ instructions to move away.

Some DPP legislators, angered by the PFP’s obvious attempts to humiliate the president, ran up to the opposition lawmakers and began to throw punches at them.

The Taipei Times reported a few cases of KMT violence as well:

[There were] scuffles in which [DPP] Legislator Lee Ming-hsien (李明憲) and Sanlih TV staff were "beaten," as well as the egging of DPP Legislator Lin Kuo-ching’s (林國慶) car.

Not sure I understand the sneer quotes around the word "beaten".  They were either beaten, or they weren’t.  If instead, they were physically harassed, then the writer ought to say so.

Anyway.  Following the ceremonies, anti-[President] Chen protesters gave visiting dignitaries a memorable taste of Taiwanese hospitality:

Meanwhile, protesters had gathered around the fringes of the ceremony zone, and tried to block the four lanes of Zhonghua Road to prevent Chen Shui-bian’s motorcade from leaving.

Unable to tell which car the president was in, the crowd rushed onto the road from the sidewalks whenever an official-looking black car appeared.

Several of the entrapped vehicles were carrying top government officials and foreign diplomatic guests. Protesters encircled the vehicles, smacking and kicking at the cars while shouting: "A-bian step down!"  [Emphasis added.  A-bian is President Chen’s nickname – The Foreigner]

With the number of anti-Chen redshirts present, it could have been much, much worse.  Whether you believe the redshirts’ own attendance numbers (1.5 million), the China Post‘s figures (300,000) or police statistics (120,000), the protesters vastly outnumbered the 5,000-man police presence.  If the redshirts had actually followed through on their mooted plans to push through police barricades, things could have gotten really ugly.

(Wednesday’s China Post finally took a look at the color of the redshirts’ uniforms, noting, "They wore red shirts the way Benito Mussolini’s Blackshirts wore their black shirts."  Funny, but just a few days ago, the paper was comparing them to the Freedom Riders – the American civil rights protesters from the 1960s.  Which probably means someone at the China Post is a bit touchy that the redshirts’ leader, Shih Ming-teh, recently took a few potshots at KMT Chairman Ma-Ying-jeou’s own corruption record*.)

The Taipei Times noted that at the end of the day, all the theatrics failed to put Taiwan on the international media map – CNN was far more interested in North Korea’s nuclear test and in paramilitary death squad activity in Iraq.  Meanwhile, a Taiwan News editorial pointed out that independence parties will henceforth be loath to participate in National Day ceremonies (which they don’t have an emotional attachment to, anyway) now that the KMT has demonstrated its willingness to disrupt one of its holiest days for political purposes.  I’ll go a step further than that, though.  I think Taiwanese independence parties will nevermore be much inhibited from disrupting Double Ten Day themselves, if they calculate it being in their interests to do so.

I cannot end without mentioning this irresistible detail:

A middle-aged woman caused a stir when, prior to the start of the ceremony, she threatened to immolate herself by igniting a bottle of liquid in the restricted area. Police carried the woman away, and the bottle was found to contain only water.

She tried to set herself on fire using H2O as an accelerant?

Now ain’t that just like a woman.

(Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo!)

Curly from The Three Stooges

(Image from Beckett.com.)


* Postscript:  A more probable reason for the China Post‘s pique: The View from Taiwan observes that Shih Ming-teh dissed [Taipei mayor and KMT Chairman] Ma Ying-jeou big-time "by not even bothering to apply for a permit to hold a demonstration," as well as by "constantly changing [the protest march] direction and completely fouling up the city’s traffic."

Shih made the KMT’s Golden Boy look ineffectual and weak, and so media adulation must be put on hold for a spell.  For now, try to remember: Shih Ming-teh is Il Duce.


UPDATE:  The View from Taiwan has a good round-up of what other bloggers had to say about the festivities.

UPDATE (Oct 16/06):  A Friday China Post headline: Controversy over control of anti-Chen mob.  From anti-corruption protesters to mob.  Further evidence the China Post is royally ticked with Shih Ming-teh, despite Saturday’s denial.


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Looking A Gift Horse In The Mouth

Don’t people have better things to do than complain about a five-day weekend*? OK, fine, the announcement was handled poorly, given only seven days in advance.  But everyone should know that this is Taiwan, and sometimes surprise announcements like that are made here.

But we’ve already bought our train tickets, critics of the government whined.  Now we have to make A PHONE CALL to reschedule.  Imagine that.  In addition, some students who were scheduled to take a National English exam next Saturday will now have to endure the terrible ordeal of taking it on the Sunday instead.  I can just imagine the wailing and the gnashing of teeth:

"My English test was postponed by an ENTIRE day!  Of all the fates on heaven and earth, why did this one have to befall ME?"

Let’s be honest: students aren’t going to complain about something like this.  Kwitcherbitchin, already.  You got a five-day weekend out of the deal, so lighten up.


* The date of the Moon Festival is determined by the occurrence of the full moon according to the Chinese Lunar Calendar.  This year, it fell on a Friday (Oct 6th), so that made for an automatic 3-day weekend.  But Taiwan’s National Day, which always falls on October 10th, was only two days later.  So the government said, let’s give folks Monday off too, to make it a continuous 5-day holiday.


UPDATE (Oct 16/06):  23 million people living in Taiwan, and the China Post can’t find ANY who are pleased that they had a five-day weekend last week?  Not a one?

More unhappy campers here.

Chiang Kai-shek: Embezzler

Heh, heh.

…DPP lawmakers also accused Chiang Kai-shek of embezzling state funds, and provided some examples.

"On Jun 13, 1961, Chiang Kai-shek used NT$4,560 ($100 US)from state funds to buy milk powder imported from abroad.  On June 14, 1963, he used NT$1,676 ($50 US) to buy medicines, picles and cigarettes, among other items.  On Sept. 14, 1973, NT$18,265 ($550 US) was used by Chiang for his grandson Chiang Hsiao-yung’s wedding photos," [legislator] Kuan [Bi-ling] said.

Does this mean Shih Ming-teh’s "anti-corruption" red shirts will start demanding the removal of the generalissimo’s statue from public places in Taiwan?

Not bloody likely.

Can We Really Be Sure They Were Compliments?

President Chen recently visited Taiwan’s Military Police Academy, and was warmly received.  Maybe too warmly, it seems:

…we were surprised and shocked to see footage of the cadets being led in bizarre cheers for President Chen, including calling the president a "handsome boy" and "my chocolate".

The China Post denounces this as toadyism and a breach of the military’s political neutrality.  As far as I’m concerned though, being called "handsome boy" and "my chocolate" by a group of armed men in uniform sounds a lot more creepy than flattering, any day.


UPDATE (Oct 12/06):  In the impartial style that it calls it’s own, the China Post reports how these cheers were later repeated during Taiwan’s National Day:

[When Chen Shui-bian appeared at the ceremonies,] opposition leaders [taunted him with] the toadying mumbo jumbo of Military Police Academy cadets: "President, President, you’re my chocolate!"

I can’t help but think that the officers of the Academy deliberately ordered the initial chants because they knew how ridiculous they were, and they knew the mockery the president would subsequently be subjected to.

Little League Not Winning? It’s The President’s Fault!

Been hearing a lot of local aquaintances talking about Wang Chien-ming, a Taiwanese who pitches for the New York Yankees.  Not a big baseball fan myself, but I guess it takes everyone’s minds off the current anti-[President] Chen rallies.

Taiwanese baseball player Wang Chien-ming, pitching for the New York Yankees

(Wang Chien-ming photo from AG’s Blog.)

Well…it doesn’t take EVERYONE’S mind off the anti-Chen movement.  For the China Post, Wang’s success is nothing more than a cudgel to beat President Chen over the head with:

All of a sudden, Wang [Chien-ming] has become a national hero…He has put Taiwan on the map, just as our little leaguers did three decades ago when they won LL World Series year after year.  Wang Chien-ming is from the crop of Taiwan’s Little League baseball, like many others now playing in America’s Major Leagues.

But the cultivation of that crop in the 70s and 80s was done by dedicated government officials and diligent people, who worked single-mindedly for national development.  Had they been corrupt or lazy, the crop would not have yielded such a fine crop as Wang Chien-ming.

Like Wang, many of Taiwan’s proud products that have made this island rich and famous are the legacies of that older era, an era that is vilified by the current administration as authoritarian and corrupt.  What is ironic is that six years after the "son of Taiwan" siezed power and ruled this island as its imperial president, the people are taking to the streets to heave him out of office.

Whoa, hold on there, chumly.  The second paragraph quoted here is clearly implying that the government of a country with a great crop of international athletes is possessing of some great moral virtue.  The former Soviet Union gives the lie to that.

Second, it seems like a pretty big leap to suggest that Taiwan’s KMT government couldn’t possibly have been corrupt because Taiwan’s Little League happened to have been victorious a few years in succession.  Non sequitur, I believe that’s called.*

Third, let us all remember that Wang Chien-ming is a miracle of nature, one of the few men alive capable (given enough training) of throwing a baseball at 95 miles per hour.  And let us especially not forget that Wang got to where he is today through years of sweat, individual effort and practice.  It’s obscene for anyone to claim Wang Chien-ming’s success belongs to the KMT Party-State and not Wang Chien-ming.

Actually, I think there’s an irony here the editorial misses completely.  What’s the China Post‘s most common lament about Taiwanese society today?  That it’s losing it’s Confucian heritage.  And yet, what could be less Confucian than the KMT of the 70s and 80s encouraging kids to play baseball rather than study for school? 

I suspect that the advent of Taiwanese democracy changed all of that.  People were now FREE to indulge their own Confucian impulses, and preferred to send their children to cram schools rather than baseball camps.  Gone were the days of the government twisting parents’ arms to let the kids play ball instead of cracking the books.  It was actually the ADVANCEMENT of Taiwan’s Confucianism which led to the subsequent DIMINISHMENT of its Little League prowess.

That’s my theory, anyway.  Blow holes in it, if you like.

One of the implications of this is that the China Post‘s pessimistic conclusion is correct:  without authoritarian KMT government, Taiwan won’t have "new crops of young people like Wang Chien-ming."  So do I, along with the China Post, think "Taiwan won’t have a future"?

Hardly.  And the reason can be boiled down to one simple word: EXAMPLE.  Taiwanese parents at one time might have been reluctant to allow their children to spend time in Little League because they couldn’t see any future profit in it.  Today however, they have men such as Wang Chien-ming to provide them with examples of people who have succeeded – spectacularly so – in professional athletics.  The example of their success will provide the incentive for "the new crop."   What’s more, I think they’ll also provide examples for Taiwanese who want to explore other non-traditional occupational fields as well.  Which will only be to Taiwan’s benefit, because there’s a thousand paths to success in this old world of ours, and not all of them involve book larnin’.


* It does bring to mind an apropos joke from p 174-175 of Keith B. Richburg’s Out of America:

An Asian and an African become friends while they are both attending graduate school in the West.  Years later, they each rise to become the finance minister of their respective countries.  One day, the African ventures to Asia to visit his old friend, and is startled by the Asian’s palatial home, the three Mercedes-Benzes in the circular drive, the swimming pool, the servants.

"My God!" the African exclaims.  "We were just poor students before!  How on earth can you now afford all this?"

And the Asian takes his African friend to the window and points to a sparkling new elevated highway in the distance.  "You see that toll road?" says the Asian, and then he proudly taps himself on the chest.  "Ten percent."  And the African nods approvingly.

A few years later, the Asian ventures to Africa, to return the visit to his old friend.  He finds the African living in a massive estate sprawling over several acres.  There’s a fleet of a dozen Mercedes-Benzes in the driveway, an indoor pool and tennis courts, an army of uniformed chaffeurs and servants.  "My God!" says the Asian.  "How on earth do you afford all this?"

This time the African takes his Asian friend to the window and points.  "You see that highway?" he asks.  But the Asian sees nothing, just an open field with a few cows grazing.

"I don’t see any highway," the Asian says, straining his eyes.

At this, the African smiles, taps himself on the chest, and boasts, "One hundred percent!"

I repeat this not because I think corruption is harmless, but because it illustrates the point that a certain level of corruption is indeed compatible with economic growth.  Or the success of a Little League baseball team.


UPDATE:  This line cannot pass uncommented upon:

What is ironic is that six years after the "son of Taiwan" siezed power and ruled this island as its imperial president, the people are taking to the streets to heave him out of office.

Like it or not (and the China Post surely doesn’t), Chen received pluralties in not one, but TWO democratic elections.  That’s not "siezing power".

Furthermore, by definition, an imperial president is one who gets his way without any check or balance.  One can hardly be called an "imperial president" when most of your legislation has been tied up for six years by the opposition.  Chen’s more impotent than imperial.

Finally, it’s no more true to say that "the people" are taking to the streets to remove Chen from office than it is to say that "the people" are taking to the streets to defend him.  SOME do the former, OTHERS the latter.  If "the people" truly wanted Chen removed, then Chen’s OWN PARTY would have voted for his recall back in June under voter pressure.

UPDATE (Oct 10/06):  Michael Turton from The View from Taiwan ascribes Taiwan’s 70s and 80s Little League victories to neither diligence nor incorruptiblity, but instead, to rampant cheating.  If that’s true, then Taiwan’s Little League record since that time is actually a testament to a growing sense of fair play within the country.  The China Post often complains that Taiwan’s morality and ethics have declined since "the good old days"; this provides at least one case to indicate that the opposite may, in fact, have happened.


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A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To Peace, Love And Understanding…

Taiwan’s anti-[President] Chen protesters sure do speak a lot in military terms, which is a bit odd for a movement that bills itself as being about "peace and love".  On National Day (Oct 10), they’re going to "lay siege" to the Presidential Office Building.  To do that, they need "siege vehicles".  And and top of that, they’re now drawing up plans for an "attack":

…the campaign is considering four different plans of "attack," including asking protesters to conduct a sit-in around the Presidential Office, confronting the police near the cordoned-off area, pushing through [police] barricades or simply pretending to push through the barricades in a symbolic gesture.

They’re thinking about pushing through police barricades?  And what, pray tell, is the plan after that?  Sing "Kumbaya" while they confront the police and storm the Presidential Building?

Symbolic gestures like that are the ones which end up getting people hurt.


UPDATE (Oct 12/06):  Correction:  The motto of the redshirts is actually, "Love, Peace and Non-Violence."  Whoops.