Western Muslims Clearly Haven’t Thought Out How Blasphemy Laws Would Really Work

The definition of stupidity must surely be demanding enaction of blasphemy laws…in countries where you're a religious minority:

Your Honor, I don't know anything about religious theology. I'm just a caveman. Everyday when I drive to the office in my red Mercedes, I'm terrified. I see other cars and wonder, "Are these evil spirits from the netherworld? Are they going to hungrily feast upon my soul?" Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, your modern world CONFUSES and FRIGHTENS me.

But I do know this: When a defendant (such this young Mohammedan gentleman) willfully and maliciously rejects the divinity of Our Lord And Saviour, Jesus Christ, then he displays contempt for the unerring pronouncements on the matter as stipulated by the Council Of Chalcedon.

This places him in direct contravention of Blasphemy Code 3 Section 34.7(g). But since he's a first-time offender, I suggest a lenient sentence: 1,000 lashes in the public square, 50 to be delivered each week over a period of 20 weeks.

I think that's fair.

Saturday Night Live: Phil Hartman before a jury wearing a fine suit and hideous makeup, playing Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer


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